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So, I may have shot myself in the foot with Femslash February.

I mentioned before in my bingo posts that I decided not to do something every day this year, as I have the past... three, I think? I'm going with three. Though I'm pretty sure it was only the last two that I wrote a new fic every day... Anyway. What I did decide to do this year is write and post something specifically for the event every week.

Now, I had no particular plan beyond that. After posting my first weekly fic and beyond, I had no idea. On the day I was meant to post the second fic, I had no idea. Would I post a different ship each week, all in different fandoms? A different ship each week but all from the same fandom? Or maybe just the same universe? Would I do something entirely new each time or do a mix of new stuff and stuff from my WIPs? No idea. So, on the day itself, I set myself to work on some femslash WIPs and also considered some ideas for a new fic. What I ended up doing is possibly the one thing I was certain that I wasn't going to do: I wrote a new fic for the same ship I'd written and posted the week before.

The thing about me is, I get caught up in patterns. And lack thereof. Either things have to be in order or there has to be a precedent for chaos (what an acceptable precedent is exactly depends on the circumstances surrounding it). Last year for Femslash February, I ended up writing a few fics I hadn't intended or even especially wanted to-- not that I regret what I came up with, mind-- because I couldn't, couldn't stand the thought of having repeats of just one fandom or just one character. During Naruto Yuri Week a couple-few years ago, I had a personal hissy fit when connectivity issues delayed me just long enough that my posting skipped a single day. I still can't stand to see all the fics lined up on my Tumblr because of the date mark.  I've been nauseated by the possibility of having the same thing happen again-- and, I'll admit it, sometimes I post "place-holders" when I'm having trouble so that the date is still correct whenever I can post properly. The bad feelings don't typically linger longer than a day-- recurrences aside-- and don't send me spiraling into any especially destructive behaviors, but they're intense while they last and I feel them all over me. So setting myself up like this? Not a great move on my part.

Granted, on the surface, it's not that hard of a hit. The second week was always going to lock me into a decision. Different fandom? That was gonna be my pattern. Different ship in the same fandom or universe? That was gonna be my pattern. By itself, settling into a "same ship each week" pattern isn't that big of a deal. And, heck, I still have some leeway. I can't do two different ships or fandoms for the next two weeks, but I have the option of doing a different ship and/or fandom for both of those two weeks than for the last two.

My problem comes with the ship itself. Anode/Lug-- or Anolug-- from IDW's Transformers title Lost Light. The characters were only introduced two issues ago but I love them both and I'm sailing into the sunset on this ship. There are a few reasons why I jumped so eagerly aboard, but my course is definitely informed at this point by spite. There's a theory going around, a distressingly plausible theory, that one of the characters doesn't actually exist. People have pointed out that no one but her partner ever addresses her directly and the one time her partner addresses her directly in front of someone, that someone responds as though she spoke to him; plot movement-wise, every scene she's in works perfectly well without her. The next issue looks like it might be set to confirm one way or the other.

This is where my feelings and my thoughts get snarled. As I said, this is a ship I'm very fond of. There's a big part of me that wants to write them for as long as canon's good for it. But while I'm writing every day, I've set myself into the pattern this month of only posting finished fics on my main accounts for Femslash February. If I'm going to write and post for it before canon shoots a canonball through it, therefore, it's going to be for Femslash February. Thus, again, one fic per week. The new issue of the comic is due to come out on the twenty-second of this month, the day after I'd post the third fic. And there's no indication of the delays that habitually plague this title because of freaking course there freaking isn't.

Still, on the surface, not that much of a problem. It'd hardly be the first non-canon ship I've sailed well beyond its compatibility with canon. See also: Most of my Naruto and Harry Potter ships, for starters. Except. Notice how I said I'm sailing this ship into the sunset, not that I'll go down with it? That's because I'm not sure I will-- can-- go down with it. If the Not Real theory is correct, how it's handled (is she a grief-projected play of Dead All Along? Is she a purely imaginary friend?) might very well send me hurtling overboard. Some ships, canon can legitimately ruin for me and no amount of Canon Discontinuity will fix them in my mind. It doesn't happen often, in the grand scheme of things, and even I'm not one hundred percent sure of what elements hit those buttons in my brain. But I can feel the fingers of canon hovering over those buttons in this case. Which means that if I post a third Anolug fic for the third week of FemFeb and then the new issue sinks the ship, I'm left floundering for the next week.

Of course, I can still commit myself to a different ship for the next two weeks instead. But if the new issue doesn't ruin my ship, I'm likely going to feel the disappointment of changing ships without strict need very keenly. On top of that, I'm just not feeling any other ship right now in a "produce content for two consecutive weeks" way. And then topping it off, I do already have an idea for another Anolug fic that I'm actually looking forward to writing... Time will tell, I suppose.
dustbunny105: (Default)
 The second of the two scenes I wrote in my vampire 'verse for my bingo card. This takes place after the last one I posted, further along so that the other main characters have gotten pretty used to Ana and she's gotten pretty used to them, but she still hasn't fully adapted to being part of their world in a friendly way. Most relevant information about the characters is again covered in the first post I made for this 'verse, but this scene in particular needs a bit more explanation.

- Beryl is a fairly new vampire, having been turned only a few years ago by the time the story takes place. As such, she's still herself getting the hang of things and coming to grips with what she is.
- However, vampires are social creatures and so she has interacted a fair deal with the community.
- Candy has also had a fair deal of interaction with the community, as Beryl's lover and an avid reader of the newsletter that circulates between supernatural creatures.
- Most vampires and assorted creatures don't actually care much about most humans to begin with and someone's human lover is seen as a fleeting feature rather than a fixture, While there are plenty of creature sorts who will happily bully a human in their ranks, many will treat them sort of like someone's cute pet. Candy is actually fairly well-liked, if not widely respected as a peer.
- Additionally, Candy met and was adopted into Damia's protection early on, so she actually enjoys more freedom moving among the community than Beryl does. Damia's protection does apply to Beryl by proxy, but Beryl is less comfortable with it due to her mixed feelings about said protection.
- The vamp who turned Beryl, not yet named, did so on a whim and then set her on her way with no guidance. This is something she's known for doing, but while people will sneer behind her back, she's established enough that few would confront her to her face.
- At this point of the story, there's a bad vibe going around and the threat of some kind of intracommunity war. Beryl has already been badly injured at this point, as have several others, and it's unknown at the time who is responsible or toward what end.
- This scene takes place in a "safe place" for creatures, a neutral ground where any number of the sort might gather to discuss problems within the community or to lay low from such problems.

Okay, so maybe "most" was overstating it. You never know how much you have to explain until you do, am I right? Anyway:

dustbunny105: (Default)
 I mentioned in my bingo breakdown that I wrote two scenes in one of my my original 'verses, specifically the vampire 'verse I'm working on. This is the first of those. The relevant context for the scene is listed with the first snippet I posted here. This takes place a while after that scene, during a period when Ana has been hanging around and establishing herself as part of the group (which does include people other than those listed, but I haven't done as much with them yet). I don't actually have a set idea of what's going on here, this was more something that popped into my head as I was thinking of how Ana and Damia would interact.

So, here we go:

dustbunny105: (Default)
Inconceivably, someone actually wanted to see the snippet I wrote that marked off my "Write Gen" square, so here we are :D It's just a conversation between two characters, very first draft, but it's been eluding me for ages and thus I'm pleased to have finally pinned it down. First, some context (doing my best not to ramble too much; I can ramble about my characters and ideas basically forever):

- This is from a vampire series I'm planning.
- Of the characters that appear or get name-dropped, Ana and Candy are humans, Beryl and Damia are vampires.
- Beryl and Candy are a couple, have been for years.
- Ana is someone Beryl was intending to drink blood from in order to absorb her knowledge as an electrician (a special ability of Beryl's rather than in-universe vamps in general) so she wouldn't have to pay someone to come fix the wiring. She accidentally initiated a bond between them, as it turns out they're essentially soulmates.
- Candy is not so happy about that last bit.
- Ana was sniffed out by someone who smelled the supernatural on her and trained as a Hunter, intending to kill Beryl under the misconception that Beryl bonded her on purpose with the intent of enslaving her. After that was cleared up, Ana was taken with the idea of having a soulmate and displayed blatant interest in pursuing a relationship with Beryl.
- Candy is even less happy about that last bit.
- Due to plot reasons I'm still ironing out but come down to dealing with a big bad, a human presence is called for to complete a task. Ana is chosen over Candy to accompany the team dealing with whatever.
- Damia (I bet you'd forgotten about Damia) stays behind with Candy because her presence in the area they're going to would be too conspicuous and because of concerns that Candy may be targeted due to her specific involvement and relative vulnerability.
- Candy won Damia's (non-romantic, non-sexual) devotion entirely by accident when they first met, something Beryl has mixed feelings about. Damia is a powerful and important figure and it's good to know Candy can count on her protection, but Beryl herself has deep-seated self-worth issues and feels inadequate as a partner by comparison.

... I think that's longer than the actual snippet... orz Anyway, here it is:

Read more... )
dustbunny105: (Default)
So, it recently occurred to me that I have a kink meme fill and a couple comment!fics that I've never spruced up and posted elsewhere. I'm talking stuff that's been taking up space on the internet for years already, like, I feel old unearthing the fill especially. Anyway, I was about to go ahead and finally do that, right? And it hit me that the whole reason I never got around to it to begin with is that I couldn't think of titles at the time. It hit me that I still cannot come up with titles now. Seriously.

How do you do titles, writers on my flist? Ever get stuck?
dustbunny105: (Default)
I feel like banging out some short fic and I don't think I'll get it done if I'm not haunted by the shame of keeping people waiting. So. Anybody? Any fandom at all that you know I am or have been into, I'll give it a try.


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